Rainy Sunday

Ha! My last post was forever ago! I guess I am Terminally Relaxed.

Today I want to talk about God. Pastor Mark preached a great sermon today about stuff I'd already been pondering, and I left with two goodish insights. Ahem:

1. Heaven is worth slugging it out for. The pastor was talking about the story of the rich man and Lazarus, and pointing out that death won't change our mental and spiritual habits- it will fix them into place. I must diligently work on myself while there is still time- my work now will pay off later. The things that tick me off and scare me and that are hard and exhausting are all worth enduring. With His help, it is possible to overcome, and it is worthwhile to make overcoming my goal. Having lived the first fifth (at least) of my life in comparatively extreme comfort and convenience, I am ahead of the game. If I was never to enjoy another happy moment for the rest of my life, then die and go to heaven, it would be worth it. If I was to be in labor for the next 70 years until I croaked, it would be nothing compared to the glory of the next life. HOWEVER. I can reasonably expect to go on being happy, with brief intermissions, until I die. It is crucial to see my struggles in perspective- as challenges to promote the development of character (a character which will continue eternally in the direction I decide to build it now), and, for the moment, as a relatively small component of a very good life.

2. Saying something doesn't make it true. We are free to say anything we can pronounce, all day long, and it doesn't have to be true. We are free to act out any hypocrisy we can think of. Saying you're doing some reprehensible thing "for God" doesn't mean it pleases Him. It's so easy for me to be thrown off when I experience unkindness from someone who is outspoken about their faith. If I don't pick myself up, brush it off, and continue walking my own walk, though, I'm not exercising intellectual honesty. It is important to recognize that not everything in God-themed packaging is endorsed by God.

I am becoming more and more impressed by the importance of keeping one's eyes on the prize. "Get your faith together", said a couple to our young families group a few months ago. That advice is looking better by the day. Having children is truly giving hostages to fate. As a mother, I worry about my baby constantly. It seems like I have developed Disaster-O-Vision. I am always worrying that he'll be kidnapped, that he'll toddle into the street and be run over, that he'll fall out the window- you name it. And if he somehow miraculously lives to adulthood and has children, THEY might die a horrendous death in infancy. And if THEY'RE somehow spared, we're not out of the woods yet- tons of people have been murdered for their faith, you know! It's bound to happen again before too long! And then, once I'm in worrying mode, I worry about myself, my husband, our future, and then about the baby again. It is only possible to worry for so long before I realize that he will never be truly safe from harm until after he's dead. (From old age after a happy and productive life, I hope!) The only available peace of mind comes from making sure he knows about God.

The other day we were sitting at the dinner table and the baby wouldn't eat. He reached out for my hand and for his daddy's hand. I realized that he wanted us to pray. Those things remind me that we're playing for eternal stakes, and that it is possible, with God's help, to win.

That is all.